With the passing of Betty White, my love of Golden Girls and my recent coming to terms that I am okay with my mediocre ability to keep up with friends, I figured it was appropriate to write a blog about friends. Before I begin talking about my own life I have to let you all know that there is a spinoff Golden Girl show called Golden Palace that I just found about and it’s pretty great. Alright, moving on. I have to admit that I am extremely lucky in the fact that I have had the same close knit group of girlfriends since middle school. It is very comforting and equally as terrifying that several people in my life pretty much know everything about me. Within this group there are friendships that are closer than others but I myself don’t regularly communicate with anyone in this group even though I love them all. Also as expected, others have evolved other close friendships through school, work and life. This hasn’t necessarily been the case for me even though throughout college and work I have developed friendships that I care deeply about, just no one I talk to regularly. I used to think that there was something wrong with me and I just needed to try harder. Recently, I have come to the conclusion that I don’t need to put pressure on myself to force friend get togethers and that my people get this about me. Also, I am okay with having my husband be my best friend. Sounds like nothing riveting but always having my friends as the closest people to me for many years it took a long time for me to be okay with this change. I have finally become comfortable with being myself in this aspect. If you are like me in the same predicament, it’s okay for you too. We all don’t need to be Sex and The City (the old seasons) characters hanging out with our girlfriends all the time. This doesn’t mean that we are not involved in our friend’s lives or that we care any less. I have learned I can be a good friend and have great friendships while not always trying to have to put pressure on myself to do so. With all this being said one of my new year’s resolutions was to be more connected with friends in a capacity that felt right to me. I did some soul searching and thought about what would be an ideal time commitment and activity to make this goal happen. Now once a month I get together with a couple of my long-term ladies and do a book club and so far it has been the perfect solution for me to see friends yet not feel overwhelmed or like I am pressuring myself. If you are feeling a little overwhelmed like I was by being the perfect friend I would suggest you do the same and see what activities and time commitments feel good to you. Maybe you will even get a good game of Ugel and Flugel in with some of your nearest and dearest.
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